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Get the life you really want

Posted by on 10:06 pm in Uncategorized | 0 comments

Calm the Chaos And get the life you really want   As a life coach I have heard so many business owners say, if only there were ten of me or My business is running me to the ground, I work 18 hour days never take a day off, I make great money but at the expense of my family, I have lots of toys but don´t have time to play with them, I want to delegate but can’t find anyone to my standards, the stress is killing me, I survive life instead of living it. It breaks my heart to hear that so many people feel this way. That is why I decided to share my 7 secrets to taking on these common problems and winning the fight on overwhelm, stress and frustration. The most common reason entrepreneurs get into business is because they are excited about their concept, they are pumped to work at something they love. They want to be their own boss, the ruler of their kingdom or the top dog so that they can have the flexibility to enjoy their lives on their terms. Unfortunately that does not always happen, sometimes things go horribly wrong and there seems to be no way out. By following the 7 simple solutions below you can learn to love your life again, reclaim the passion you once had and become healthy, happy and fulfilled once again. Release the breaks – I hate to break it to you but you are not number one, you are not the only one in this world capable of running a business, one day you will be gone and someone else will take your place in this big bad world. Face it is true. –Once you make this realization you will find that a huge load is lifted off your shoulders. It feels good to know that if you need a break someone else will be there to take over.  You need to let go of the thought no one is good enough, they won’t do it as well as I can or they won’t uphold my high standards. Ask yourself who you would be without this thought and see if you don´t feel better. If that doesn´t work ask yourself if you afraid they will be better than you?   Stop doing triage – Entrepreneurs often get caught up in the thick of it. There are constant request, endless to do lists and constant emergencies so they have to constantly put out fires. Life becomes a big panic attach. They are always thinking about what they have to do next instead of staying in the moment and focusing on getting things done now. Take a minute to step back and look at what is really happening in your business. Slow down and take it on as a process instead of a struggle to survive. Your attitude and how you perceive the situation can make you or break you, so choose the one that will work for you.        Remember your dreams – When you were younger you had goals and dreams. You knew that they would work themselves out so that motivated you to build your business. You had loads of momentum, contagious passion and an unending drive to take...

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A Moment in Time- That is all we have with our Children

Posted by on 5:09 am in Uncategorized | 0 comments

I have had the opportunity to spend time with my children who have been away at university and with my daughter who is going to be away for 6 moths, my youngest who is 16 for the past month. My youngest is going to go to school in Canada while I will be living in Iceland. We have had alone time which we never have and it is awesome. We talk, laugh, are silly, make dinner and go out to book stores and find treasures. It makes me think a lot. I was at my sisters the other day and she was showing us videos of my kids when they were little. I know they should make me happy but they don´t. They make me sad because those days are gone. I will never have them back. I cant remember the faces, expressions, silliness, or funny things that they said. I draw a blank, those memories are lost. I almost want to go to a hypnotist and have those memories brought up up the surface so that I remember them. Tonight I got the thought into my head that we have a moment in time. That is it, a moment in time with our children, It is precious, wonderful and fleeting. It disappears before we know it. With that thought in mind I cherish each moment, each hour and each momentary drama that happens because I know that before I know it it will e all over. My aunt was over yesterday and she was telling me that she is 58, she knows now that time is of the essence. It will be over in less that 25 years or so. That when we look back is no time at all. Maybe it is time to let all the fears fall away, get rid of all the insecurities and just enjoy what is. This is it. This is life, today, there is nothing else. Soon we will be gone and life will go on.  ...

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How Can You Expect to Help Others When You Don´t Help Yourself?

Posted by on 4:14 am in Uncategorized | 0 comments

You are a business owner, you are juggling family and work and trying to still keep your own sanity. You want to have time for yourself but you always seem to be the last in line. No matter what you do it never seems to work. You need to find a support system to help you. You want to help others but you are not helping yourself. You build your business, market like a fiend, tweet, write articles, send out Facebook statuses and work your but off. You feel overwhelmed and feel like everything at home is falling apart. That is not good enough. You deserve to have it all, a family that loves you and you have amazing moments with, a business that is successful and a friends network that you cherish, but what are you doing for yourself? Do you have someone that supports you? As a business owner you know that without support you will wither away, overwhelmed by everything you need to do everyday. You built your business and you supported your family but what about you? Investment in you is the single biggest business decision you can make to boost not only your business but your families well being. Join me on a journey to make your life a life you love to live. Contact me for a free session and begin your journey to happiness at home and in your business.   Contact me Your work life balance coach...

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The Business of Being a Mom-How to Eliminate Stress and Love Your Life

Posted by on 6:43 pm in Family, Feeling Overwhelmed, Happiness, Kids, Light Hearted Lessons, Mindset, mompreneur, Motivational, Productivity, Time Management, Uncategorized, Work Life Balance | 0 comments

This post is dedicated to you girls, you know who you are. Being a stay at home mom has its perks but it also has a downside. The image of being what I call a front line coordinator is awesome for those that don’t do it. It is coveted by working moms world wide because they believe you get these incredible moments, fantastic times when you connect with your kids and that life is just easier, smoother and pleasant when you are home. We are going to explore that in this post. What is life like a working mom? Wake up, get the kids up, get them to brush their teeth, get dressed, eat breakfast, all the while trying to get your face on, trying to do something about that hair and pick clothes so you look presentable. You drag them to the car  a panic because you are afraid you will be late for work. Shit you forgot the lunches, OK Tim Hortons drive through and were good. You drop them off, sad, complaining, probably missing something they really need either at school or if your a single mom at their dads later when he picks them up. Crap, what’s next? Guilt, guilt and more guilt. You go to work unprepared, frazzled and exhausted. This is your life. You struggle all day to feel like you have a handle on things, but you don’t. Next thing you know its time for home. If you have to pick up the kids you are stressed. What do you make for dinner? What is actually in the fridge? You need to get it over with fast because you are fading. You get them home and they are antsy, they need your attention. They need for you to listen, be there, be present. You on the other hand are everywhere else in your mind, At work, at the grocery store, in your head. After dinner you struggle with giving them a bath and putting them to bed. You tell yourself, I only spent 2 hours with them…I am a bad mother, why do I suck at this. You finally sit down to work but all you want to do is tune out but the house is a mess. You clean, organize for tomorrow then flop intl bed exhausted.   The stay at home mother… You get up with the kids, get them fed and off to school all the while juggling the needs of a preschooler. Maybe you drive them or walk, whatever, but you get it done. You come home and see the mess. You clean it up while trying to keep the little one busy but its not going very smoothly. You feel you should do more, not cut corners so maybe you bake a lot, volunteer, drive the kids everywhere. You are their personal maid, assistant, helper. You get lunches ready, do laundry, clean their rooms, you do what needs to be done. You spend the day, making snacks, lunch, cleaning up toys, going to the park and grocery shopping. When the kids come home you make them a snack, deal with the problems of the day and just try to cope. Dinner is next on the list. You struggle to find something everyone will eat. After dinner its...

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Why a summer internship is essential for your future

Posted by on 3:44 am in Life Coach, MISL, Uncategorized | 0 comments

After a grueling first semester, what most students want to do, once exams are over, is to tune out. That´s understandable, however what they should be doing is tuning in, to the internship programs available. The big bad world is a beast when it comes to finding a job after graduation. It is intimidating to say the least, especially if you have kept your head down and done your best to get good grades and are looking for a competitive job. The problem is that good grades may not be enough these days. Many students and employers now believe that it´s not just your grades that matter but the experience you have gained during your University years. That can be done through joining clubs, teams, contributing to newspapers, doing charity work, apprenticing or doing summer internships. This article is going to enlighten you on the benefits of summer internships, which I think are the best way to gain experience during school and to prepare you for the working world. I know some of you may feel that this is not a necessary path to follow. Others may say that they need to hunker down and make as much money as they can just to pay for school while others want the summer off. Fine, great but in my opinion, it is worthwhile to try to have it all. The University years are the most crucial part of your life. They set the scene for the beginning of your career. This is the time when you are writing your CV with your personal experiences and unfortunately you can´t go back at the end of University and add stuff in what you wished you had done. It just doesn´t work that way. Get your foot in the door Look!  You are one in a million, no really, we know that you are special, after all your mother has been telling you that all your life and I am sure she is right, but recruiting manager’s don´t know you from a hole in the ground. They receive piles of amazing CV’s for each position they advertise and they have to weed out the best candidates, so you need to be special i.e., have a leg up on the competition. If you can get into a company and prove yourself as an intern there are three benefits to it which a; you may get hired on full time right away or once school is finished, you could get a recommendation from a leading company in your chosen industry you may even be able to go back and write your masters theses in collaboration with that company. Stand out from the crowd Employers like to see job related experience when considering you for a position. They look at your experience, your experiences and your interests. Companies want to hire well rounded individuals, not just letters and numbers on a CV. You can be the smartest person in the world but if you cannot function in a work environment, or you are not resourceful enough or interested enough to go beyond your dorm room then most companies will back down. They have to work with you so they need to know you are personable, resourceful, and independent, have a personality, have the confidence to give...

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Fight or Flight at the Nail Salon

Posted by on 11:41 pm in Drifa´s Favorite Things / Reviews and Suggestions | 0 comments

I am a serious critic when it comes to nail salons. I have a really hard time going anywhere since I was a working esthetician for 13 years most of which if not all, I was a perfectionist. I had to get an overlay on my nails today as they were all on the verge of breaking, only 8 out of 10 were whole. You know how it is ladies, when you gotta you gotta. Had I not gone I would have ended up breaking a nail, swearing bloody murder at anyone in the vicinity and being incredibly irritable for the rest of the day. NOT HAPPENING!   So I had suggested to my sister who is not as critical as I am, that she should get her nails done. It is such a great idea if you are feeling overwhelmed because it gives you a pick-me-up. You feel pretty, more dressed up and better about yourself because you did something for yourself. It is worth it on all fronts. I highly suggest it.   Anyhow as I was saying my sister went to get her nails done and she was very happy with the results.  The place she went to looks good from the outside, is very busy and has a large capacity for services and clients. At least 15 woman can have their nails done at once, it is similar for pedicures and they are full service, so they have massage and esthetic services as well. I had seen her nails which were typical low cost salon nails and were fine or as fine as they get. I knew of course just by looking at them what I would find there so when she suggested I go there I was a little apprehensive.   I went anyway….out of curiosity, self masochism, a whim? What greeted me was exactly as  I had expected, a busy salon, nail techs with masks, nail drills galore, fans, air brushes and freshly done too thick acrylic nails. What I did not expect was what happened next. Firstly, just so you know, while you wait there is nothing to read. Common!!! Next they seat me at a FILTHY table. OK I thought, they will clean it before they start.   WRONG!   No no, the nail tech sits down with her filthy paws outstretched at me ( black fluff hanging from her nail), waiting for mine and asks what I want done. I tell her an overlay and she pulls out a dusty drill and even dirtier drill bits. I KID YOU NOT! ( Now I know you must be wondering why I did not run screaming out of the salon) I don´t know, I will tell you I did have the fight or flight feeling. My panic level was creeping up minute by minute. So she begins buffing my nails ( I had gel on some of them before) and removing old product and smoothing. By this time I was a bit skittish, pulling away at the slightest feeling of stress. The shavings from the drill were bright red like the nail polish I had been wearing. Once the nails were all buffed she blows the dust away with compressed air. OK I get it but no disinfectant? In stead she primes...

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When you lose hope know there is a new tomorrow

Posted by on 12:34 am in Coaching, Feeling Overwhelmed, Looking Inside | 0 comments

I just spoke to a good friend of mine that recently lost her husband. She has two children 4 and 6 and they are struggling just as she is with the loss of the love of their life. Loss is a part of life but it never seems to be something we get use to or can fully accept. After a heart felt conversation with her it makes me reflect on life, love and how to go on. She had lived through a very difficult childhood, challenging adolescents and heartbreaking mental illness but has always been one of the strongest people I know. She reminds me of the Gloria Gainer song I will survive because no matter what happens she seems to be able to bounce back. I admire her strength, tenacity and perseverance. She has broken the circle of dysfunction that she grew up with and is a fabulous mother and role model.   In the past 3 years I have lost my grandfather, aunt, father in law and best friend. Before that no one that I was close to had idea so I really had no compass for death or how to deal with the feelings that come along with it. I have learned that it is part of life, never welcome, always hard and sometimes lifechanging. I may be floating through ideas here so forgive me but this is a thought process. Many years ago my friends daughter was palliative with cancer. She was very young, child and was in a lot of pain. Her mother who is an incredibly powerful writer wrote me an email that touched my heart. She asked that I pray for her daughter to die soon and quickly. The pain this small child was going through was unbearable and as all parents feel she wanted to stop the pain for her child letting go of her own need to keep her with her. It was heartbreaking yet so incredibly loving that I have never forgotten that letter and I never will. I was at a friends for coffee today and she was telling me about the loss of her father last year. Since then she has had a series of health problems that I think are related to the grieving process. That to is heartbreaking because we can love so much that we almost stop living just trying to get through today. Death is a gateway, a passage and a process for those involved. It makes me think about something that I heard a while back. It was that the only people that are sad when someone dies are those that are left behind. OK that makes sense. So what about those of us that grieve for those that have passed? Well if you think about it if we loved them that means that they loved us. They want the best for us and would be very sad to see us sad. I don’ t want to make them sad, I want them to feel at peace so that said maybe we should not rejoice in their going to a better place but honor them with love, memories and respect. Maybe how we feel here, now, will affect them, so lets pick ourselves up and go on, for them, to honor them an the relationship we...

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How to increase your sales without compromising your integrity!

Posted by on 4:51 pm in Accomplishment, Goals, Micro Expressions and Body language, Motivational, Productivity, Uncategorized | 0 comments

Most sales professionals would like to excel at their jobs, but find themselves struggling to achieve increased sales. An easy way to combat this problem is to learn to read your customers micro expressions. If you are in sales, you understand how important it is to make a sale. If you are like me you feel like it is a challenge, a puzzle and an exciting journey, but it can be very challenging especially when you feel you are not connecting with the customer or cannot really see how they are feeling towards what you are saying. Many sales people look for advice, books on selling better and sales courses to help them increase their sales but find that the advice and practices that are required make them feel uncomfortable. Having a high standard for personal ethics, practicing integrity and being honest genuine and a good listener not only give you a satisfying feeling at the end of the day but can increase sales however you may feel you would like to get an edge on the competition. Thats what I want to help you with. Learning to read the micro expressions of your clients can help you to not only sell more effectively but also to connect on a deeper level with your customers. In a typical sales environment you spend anywhere from 10-20 minutes qualifying the customer trying to learn about their likes, budget, preferences, and willingness to buy. The problem with that is that by only listening and asking questions you are only really getting half of the truth. By learning to read microexpressions in your sales process and using the BLINK method you can learn what your client or customer wants in 2-4 minutes with an 80% accuracy rate. It has been proven that sales rates for sales professionals go up by 20% just by earning these simple techniques. Imagine being in a sales conversation that verbally is going great, the customer is responding positively to everything you say and you think the sale will fly through only to be disappointed when the customer walks. You are confused by what just happened and don´t know what went wrong. Now imagine that you have mastered the art of recognizing micro expressions and have the ability to use the BLINK technique. You begin with the same conversation but despite the positive response of the client you notice that they are responding negatively. This is where you can customize your sales to how they respond allowing not only you to feel better but the client to leave feeling happy understood and satisfied with the successful purchase. If you are interested in learning more about the BLINK technique or Micro Expressions you can go to The Center For Body Language which is the number 1 rated center for body language in the world.   Want to learn more about how to increase your sales with micro expressions and the BLINK technique? CLICK HERE   < iframe src=”” width=1010...

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What can knowing body language do for you?

Posted by on 11:21 pm in Body Language, Uncategorized | 0 comments

  I have recently been introduced to body language and have become fascinated with all the possibilities that it has opened up for me. In the spring of 2015 I will be opening up a training center for body language here in Iceland. It is an exciting opportunity that will greatly improve the way  people do in sales, negotiation, understand their children, and understand how they affect the people around them. The Center for Body Language is a great place to have the opportunity to take a free test to experience how well you interpret body language and to learn more about it. Body language is a great way for you to improve your relationships, reap more rewards in sales, negotiating with confidence and avoiding misunderstandings. The more I learn about body language the more excited I feel about the possibilities it creates in life, work and life in general. Imagine talking to your spouse and being able to see, really see how they feel? What if you were selling and you could customize your pitch to how the client feels? What would happen if you were negotiating and you could customize your presentation to how they are feeling towards you? Just think about the possibilities. If you are interested in learning more no matter where you are from check the Center for Body Language out!     As always feel free to check out coaching, my products and get my free report.   Always yours,   Drifa Ulfarsdottir CPC Your Certified Life Coach Change your life...

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Will you get more done by doing less?

Posted by on 10:17 pm in Productivity, Time Management | 0 comments

I recently read an interesting article by Alex Cavoulacos on which is an online magazine. The article was called  called One founder´s best productivity tricks: save time and do less.  In the article Alex gives some great tips and tricks that really work in todays busy work life. She sets the article up by asking seven powerful questions that encourage you to really look at how you spend your time. Her seven questions are as follows; 1. Do you say no? 2. Are you delegating enough? 3. Is  everything on your to do list necessary? 4. Are all of the recurring meetings in your calendar necessary? 5. For one-off meetings, is your default length too long? 6. Do you even need a meeting at all? 7. Are you a slave to your inbox?   She details constructive ways to improve your productivity while saving time. I like her article and find it easy to understand as well as informative. It is always refreshing to get new incites from others.  A lot of what she says are the staples I also use in my practice and with my clients when working on time management issues.  As in number one where she says “Do you say no? “. So many of my clients come to me with this exact problem. They are unable to effectively decline even when they know that they should. When that happens they become overwhelmed and stressed out causing the workload to not only pile up but seem insurmountable. Being able to say no to assignments, favors or requests is an essential part of managing your time and work life balance. Her second question ” Are you delegating enough? is a great question. One of the issues a lot of my clients have is that they feel if they do not do the job themselves it wont get done. I can understand why they feel this way however that thought is counterproductive. All of us generally want to do thins right but that does not mean we need to do them. Some of the greatest CEO´s know that delegation is the key to getting more done. This also works in the work world. By delegating projects that you do not find interesting or that you know someone else can do sufficiently you can free up your time to do the things that really require your attention. Her third question “Is everything on your to do list necessary?” is an essential question to ask because it is so easy to get caught up in the little things. We try to over accomplish, over do and we load ourselves up with tasks that do not really bring us closer to our goals. Not only should you be asking yourself that question but also is my to do list helping me to  accomplish the right goals. That said those goals need to be SMART goals. Specific, measurable, attainable, reasonable, and timeset. If we pile on things to our to do list that do not help us to achieve our goals or if we put too many items on our list we are actually working against ourselves. Everyone has things that come up unexpectedly each day and in order to feel and be productive you need to account for that rather than trying to do too much at once and not finishing anything. The fourth question she wants you to ask is “Are all the...

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