Feel the Fear and Do it Anyway
We all feel fear, it is the natural way our body and mind tell us to be aware of danger but that does not mean that we should not go forward.
We need to confront our fears in order to move forward in life. We need to accept them, embrace them and allow ourselves to feel the fears we experience in order to move on.
Everyone feels fear.
In the cave man days fear protected us from predators, dangers and daily life. Today fear is our concoction. It helps us to know when we need to take charge, look closely at what we are doing and to reevaluate where our life is going. We cannot allow fear stop us from experiencing life or going forward because if it does we will be stagnant.
We have seen this in the lives of our friends when they fear making changes that will help them to go forward. We see it in our children when they fear change like trying a new food, meeting new people or going to new places. We experience it in ourselves when we feel fear about making changes in our lives despite knowing it is the right path.
I have noticed a lot if not all of my clients expressing fear about leaving their comfort zone, achieving success or going towards the path that they know will bring them success. Fear is natural, what you do with that feeling is a choice. Sometimes life offers us opportunity that seems so huge, so amazing and so unbelievable that we back away from it.
We have to stop being afraid and we need to begin to trust in our own abilities. You have to be willing to be terrified in order to gain real success. If you trust you intuition and believe in yourself you can muster up the will and determination to realize you goals. The problem is that sometimes we forget the goal, the determination and the confidence we had and we back down ruining all hope of success.
What needs to happen is we need to find our why. We need to understand why we have the driving need to go to the place where we will achieve our goals.
We all want certainty. Of course that is a natural part of life but the funny thing is that life is not about certainty. No one ever succeeded by knowing for absolute certain that they were heading to success.
We create our fears by letting the little person on our shoulder, the alter ego if you will, influence us, but as many people know, you cannot listen to the thoughts that bind you. Your thoughts are like a smorgasbord, a table full of all kinds of foods. You need to decide which ones you want and which ones you don´t.
You are basically run by fear, You fear asking for what you want because you fear rejection, persecution, disappointment or ridicule. You fear asking for a raise, fear asking the neighbor to make his dog stop barking, fear going out and getting what you want, fear becoming successful because you don´t feel you deserve it. That is the way most people are. If you want to stop this insanity you need to have a different perspective on life. You need to start using your intuition rather than your feelings. Listen to your intuition not the rules, beliefs or customs created by the people around you. All rules, beliefs and boundaries that you experience are made by someone else. Do you really want to live your life by someone else’s rules?
Ask yourself what you want but are afraid of asking for.
- A raise
- A divorce
- The kids cleaning the kitchen
- Your friends showing you more support
- Acceptance about your sexuality
- Belief in you
- The sale
- More and better service
- Less judgment
- A committed relationship
Only you can change the way you feel. Only you can ask for what you want. Only you can face you fears and conquer them.
I believe in you. I know you can do it, the thing is you may not be ready. Maybe you need more trouble, more heartache, more sorrow in order to have enough. You have to decide that.
One day you will decide to have a better life. You will decide that you have had enough and when you do I will be there to support you.
Take some time to try this exercise. Write down like you are brainstorming everything that you want and why you are afraid to do it. Then behind that write down what is the worst thing that can happen and then what is so bad about that. Ask yourself if that is something you are willing and able to accept.
One of the most powerful statement I have ever said is I don’t have to do this anymore. Allow yourself to say it and feel the feelings associated with the words. You don’t have to live this way anymore. You can change, if you want to.
Certified Life Coach
Work Life Balance Expert
Helping you to balance your business and your family without sacrificing yourself.
Get what you want, you deserve it.
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Drifa Ulfarsdottir CPC , founder and CEO of Balanced Mompreneur is a Certified Professional Coach specializing in work life balance and a member of ICF. She helps busy mompreneurs stop the tug of war between their families. By using her simple solutions mompreneurs can find more time for themselves, their families and their business so they become better mothers, wives, sisters,daughters friends and business owners
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Live, love, laugh and enjoy the moment because good or bad it will never come again.