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Posted by on Jul 9, 2013 in Accomplishment, Blame, Family, Freedom, Goals, Happiness, Life Coach, Light Hearted Lessons | 0 comments

Taking 100% Responsibility for Your Life

Today I realized that there are a lot of people out there that need help trying to figure out how to make their lives phenomenal. Its about making a decision to change the way you perceive your life and how you want to react to it. There are so many twists and turns in life that can affect what happens next in your life and what your future will bring that you really need to be on top of how you deal with them.

Your life is the result of the way that you deal with it. It is the culmination of all the decisions you have made, every reaction you have had and each and every choice you have made. Many people today feel they are entitled to something good in life. They feel that life owes them or that society owes them something when this is not the case. Life does not owe you anything instead you owe yourself something. You owe yourself the respect to take control of your life. You are your own problem. You are the one that complains, sits by idly when you need to stand strong and says yes when you should say no or visa versa.


Complaining can become an art of sorts. You can create a cocoon around you protecting you from the reality of life. It is your story that lets others know that you are justified in not taking action on your life. Everyone of us needs to decide to change our conversations to reflect, not what we don´t want but rather what we do want. We need to be proactive about what we want in life. We need to have goals that we are unafraid of pursuing. We need to have the self confidence to reach for our goals and to live our dreams.

That means we need to have the guts to have goals and dreams and the tenacity to figure out how we can achieve them. By deciding what you want and making a plan to achieve your goals you can begin to live your dream every day. The key is to decide you want to achieve your goals and then to make a smart plan to achieve it. SMART Specific, Attainable, Relevant, Time bound. By making sure you have a goal that you want to achieve you can make sure that you are held accountable to the life plan you have chosen.


What does not taking 100% responsibility for your life look like? If you believe that life just happens and that you are a victim you are not taking 100% responsibility for your life. If you complain to people about your life or things that are happening in your life and are not taking steps to correct them or are not letting the people that can change the situation know that you are unhappy know about your situation then you are not being proactive. If you are always in the same situation no matter how many jobs, friends or boyfriends you have   you are not taking responsibility for you part in the situation because you are the common denominator. If you are always unhappy and feel that life does not go your way you need to do something to change it. If you feel desperate and constantly make excuses for your situation or have a story for each time you do not meet your commitments you need to reevaluate what you are doing.


You can wait endlessly but things will only change if you make the conscious choice to change them.


What does taking responsibility for your life look like? Well it looks like this; when you make a mistake admit it and take responsibility for your mistake. If you make a commitment make sure that you meet those commitments. If you tell a friend you will be there for them do it. If you are suppose to be at work at 9 am be there no excuses. If you decide to get in shape then drag your ass to the gym, no excuses. If the bus is late, you are too tired, someone does not pick you up at the right time or if you fail a test you cannot blame someone else. It is all about making a commitment. If your parent were in the hospital you would move heaven and earth to be there with them so you should do the same for yourself.


In order to take 100% responsibility for the life that you live today you need to keep a few things in mind. You need to get rid of self doubt because all it does is sabotage you and does not give you anything to make you a better person. Start talking to the right people. If you are unhappy or have a problem don´t complain to those that cannot help you to change it. Choose people that can help you make a change in your life. Remember that you either deny or allow everything that happens to you period. If you have a roommate for instance that asks you for money and you lend it to them out of guilt but never get it back that is on you. Stop lending them money. If you have a spouse that is cheating and you cannot live with that leave, if you have kids that don’t listen create concrete consequences that you stick to no matter what and if you have a car get it maintained because if you don´t it is on you when it breaks down.


If you want to achieve what you truly are capable of you need to take responsibility for getting it. Take notice of the red flags that you experience in life. If your spouse is absent, avoids answering questions or disappears mysteriously take notice. If have a bad feeling about someone make sure you trust your instincts. If you are going to commit to someone but know its wrong get out of there. if you are in a job that compromises your values switch jobs. If you have a feeling things are going down hill take evasive action. If you feel like you are compromised stand up. If you know you are not challenged find something else. if you are being cheated demand retribution.


The conclusion is that you are responsible for your life. Only you can decide if you succeed or fail  You are the only one that can actually influence whether you succeed or fail hands down. If you take responsibility for your life you will inadvertently make it much easier. By taking action to make your life better it will change, there is no question. You will be on time, you will get in shape, you will be more organized, you will change things you do not like, you will be able to take difficult situations by the horns and you will be in control. Imagine that! I am not saying that this is the easy way what I am saying is that this is the road that gives you the results you seek. Avoidance, procrastination and non decision are the root of all evil. Be proactive, take charge and love your life.


Drifa Ulfarsdottir

Certified Life Coach

Work Life Balance Expert


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Drifa Ulfarsdottir CPC , founder and CEO of Balanced Mompreneur is a Certified Professional Coach specializing in work life balance and a member of ICF. She helps busy mompreneurs stop the tug of war between their families. By using her simple solutions mompreneurs can find more time for themselves, their families and their business so they become better mothers, wives, sisters,daughters friends and business owners
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